What’s the point of being negative or fearful? We can’t control it. –Mathew Ashford
My last post ended up with my arrival in Jaipur, and the diagnosis waiting for me to shatter me for a second.
As it was a long journey, by the time me and my father reached Jaipur, the Sun left us to his own home, it was dark outside like me from inside when I saw three smiling rays approaching near the ambulance in which I was brought to Jaipur, and they were the one who always inspire me a lot and sometimes I do for them 🙂
Meet my siblings we proudly call ourselves “Four Cartoons.”
I wanted to hug them but could not, yet in our in usual way we greeted each other by saying “Yo”. Dad decided that my elder sister Garima Di will accompany us to the hospital.
We reached Mahatama Gandhi Hospital, a stretcher was brought and again I was lifted with the bed sheet and transferred on the stretcher. What an irony, a girl who used to lift up a filled LPG cylinder like she was lifting flowers, now is on bed and unable to move even like a sloth!
It’s something I don’t want anyone to feel…
Remember I told you in my last post that we had a second opinion with other doctors, and thus here was something waiting for me which made my life take a U TURN.
The Head of department of Orthopedics Dr. Rajeshawar Kalla was the one who advised my sister to bring me to Mahatma Gandhi hospital, and thus it was followed.
Meanwhile I was laying on the stretcher in the emergency ward surrounded by lots of doctors, nurses and ward boys, and not to mention other patients like me, I saw a boy who was brought by his relatives after an accident which made the boy go in trauma seeing him behaving like nuts I thanked myself and My Inner voice to be calm and composed, but suddenly was interrupted by two resident doctors named Dr. Rishabh and Dr. Mahipal. They were the people who had to take care of me till the main doctor didn’t visit me.
After taking whole lot information about my accident I heard them saying, maybe I will go for an operation or series of operation, which terrified me, guys! I am just 23 or 24 and you say series of operation, you must be kidding, I haven’t accepted myself lying on the bed doing nothing and you talk of operation, I wished it was better for me to be in Gurgaon at least the doctor there was not talking of operations!
While dad and di (elder sister) were completing the forms and other formalities, the doctors came near me and told that a pin will be drilled in my knees so as to make the traction work properly, and I was like what! Please repeat what the hell are you saying, my body is having serious wounds all around and you want to give me some more of them, I wanted to cry loudly guys please stop talking all this nonsense it’s hurting me, it’s making me go crazy, but I knew I had to be strong I knew I will be ok, but… 😦
After sometime di and dad arrived near my stretcher, I was taken to X-Ray room X-Ray taken, then to CT scan room, each step covered by me always said don’t worry everything will be good your body will not suffer any more pain,no operation, no drilling nothing but every time when I was transferred to the tables from my stretcher and vice versa there was something which was pinching causing intense pain, whole lower body was in pain, but still the positivity in me always told DON’T WORRY YOU ARE PERFECTLY ALL RIGHT.
Oh dear I wish it was true, soon I was shifted on CT scan table and my lower body entered the hollow circle, it felt like I am giving my final year examinations and everything depends on this final scan of papers, to be true somewhere it was really exciting to see the CT scan machine all by my eyes.
Finally I was shifted to a semi private room bed no. 36, accompanied by a ward boy and my dad and sister. It was a room especially for women who were pregnant so there were ladies who had swollen stomach or with flat stomach with their baby on a side.
The ward boy who shifted me on the hospital bed was a gentle yet a strong man,I still thank him for not making feel bad about my weight or about my inability to move, he was such a good person.
And it was women ward hence dad was not allowed to stay with me so di stood with me.
Soon after everything settled the nurses on duty came up with the weight weighing 2 kg and 5 kg which was attached to my both tractions .
Followed by some routine checkups and data collection, I remember they checked my blood pressure, pulse rate, and cardiogram was also recorded .
I can never forget the night I had spent on 25th January, it is one of the worst nights I have ever seen, filled with so much pain, agony. Every time I made my di wake up as there was something wrong with the tractions, they were making my pain sensors bubble up.
My ankle had swollen up which made me feel more pain.I was crying like a baby everytime the nurses gave my sister some medicated gauge to insert in between my traction and my heel and said it pains in this manner only.
At that moment I only thought of how I will stay like this for 22 days? It’s painful. On top of this Jaipur is not as cold as Gurgaon was, and I was dressed as the same.
Oh! I forgot to tell you something about my dress. When I was in Gurgaon I had wore thermals followed by a sweat shirt and then a jacket, but due to the accident my lowers were completely tore off so they had to be discarded and all the time I was just in my lower thermal, my jacket was also in that same bad situation so they were also removed.
Well it was about 9 AM when a team of doctors came near my bed it was easy to recognize my doctor, if now you tell me to describe him I would say he is an angel with long masculine body with white hair and beautiful confident smile on his face like the sun has given him the source to light up the worlds of his patient, his eyes full of confidence yet careful something like of the greatest Detective of all time Sherlock Holmes and I will let you know why I am calling it.
For me he is like a Hulk as he can become the great sensitive and accurate man as well a massive strong decision maker.
He saw the tractions and was like are you guys nuts! What is this ,this is not the right way to put traction, remove everything. Soon doctors lifted me up like I was 1 day old baby removed tractions from my both leg, wow! What a relief, as my whole leg had severe wounds (which still after 5 months persist) it was not decided there wont be any drilling that was a relief for me but soon a shock arrived.
I was commanded to lift up my left leg and move it as there were blue patches all over it and followed my bumps, I tried but could not, then he told me to move my neck which also came as big NO, he told me to move my upper part and I was NO I can’t I am NOT…
So now I will show you why I could not.
Other than these huge fractures I was having other multiple small fractures in my hip bones, but the one most sophisticated and serious was in Right leg. There is a pelvis ring called acetabulum which joins the lower and upper side of our body and in my case this was affected.
There a bone had broken down into 8 pieces, yes you read it right 8 pieces.
Now when I think the severity of my accident I believe I can never forget those people, they have ruined my life.
But in those moments I was brave and happy, only one feeling that I was living not a dead person.
Till 2nd February, 2016 I never understood the seriousness of my case. Although my test result showed that my body was in trauma and trouble but in my mind I was still happy chirpy girl who thought everything is going to be fine.
I have always been a playful strong girl, people near me were always in the mood oh! Common there is no any physical or mental work or stress through which Mahima can’t go through, but now the fact is I am trying to live a CLOSE to NORMAL LIFE but NOT a NORMAL LIFE.
I always wander on mountains and go for tracking forget about walking on a mere slope now I can’t even walk on a simple road, I never wanted anyone to lift of heavy objects climb on walls or platforms but now I can’t even stand straight. I had enough strength to protect my family members from anything wrong and now I even afraid of fast moving bicycle they make me feel like they will come over me and will hurt again.
This is a U TURN my life took.
I always wanted my life to surprise me; I even know that only after complete destruction seeds of new hopes and life can come, but there growth and survival speed is really slow, so slow that it can make you go crazy.
But still I am proud of myself.
Please if you read the post do comment something specially on any incident in your life that made your life take a U TURN as that can inspire people and help them like in my case it did.
Till then Hasta La Vista.